Life can be so interesting at times, right? I mean, one minute you're on top of the clouds and then the next minute you're below them getting rained on; some would argue that's just the way it goes. I for one don't mind the rain IF I'm prepared for it of course.
For the better half of the last ten years or so, I've attempted to write what's on my heart and on my mind, I've allowed myself to be vulnerable but at the same time guarded, perhaps even mysterious to some degree. Most people will tell you that I'm a very happy-go-lucky individual, they might even tell you that I'm the life of the party; I'll tell you that I'm a simpleton who's trying to simply make it within this world of chaos.
Over the course of the last few years, it has become increasingly apparent, to me, that I have options, options being to either be happy or sad, resentful or grateful, stagnant or flexible (I was going to use the word stretchy but all I could think of was Nacho Libre and his stretchy pants). Now, with this being stated, I've also taken note of people who have the same powers to change their mindsets. I'm tired of the day in and day out moaning of some people, I'm tired of the faces that don't carry a smile or energy, I mean for fuck sake, smile, you've been given the ability to have your muscles create something so beautiful! Anyone offended by the word fuck, I would apologize but it's in the dictionary so take it up with Webster's.
It seems as though it was just yesterday when I had lost my way due to me being caught up in my own emotions, being caught up within my own thoughts. The world was caving in all around me, I was sinking, and I needed a lifeline. The moment I realized that I had options to survive was the very moment, I stood up and noticed I was standing in only a foot worth of crap.
We aren't meant to be options whether that be someone's time, energy, love, kisses, hugs, calls, texts, promises, or dreams. It seems as though I've been carrying some of these things around with me for some time. It's strange to express this because I'm a 42yr old man who is a hopeless romantic and wanting nothing more than someone to hold me, love me, and mean it wholeheartedly (well if not love at least like me).
Many years ago, I would have remained quiet, remained hidden, but today I'm standing here thinking life is too short to not risk more, kiss more, dance more, sing more, travel more, laugh more, or sit more atop of mountains looking at the clouds traveling below me. Remember, I don't mind the rain if I'm prepared for it.
We all have options, I'm using mine for the good so IF you don't happen to hear from me any time soon, just know that it's not personal, it's just personal, there's really no other option.