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  • Nemi

Insecurities


I believe one of the hardest things which one has to deal with is their insecurities. We currently live in an age where looks are everything and status is coveted and the number of likes you receive is almost as important as the number of people who follow you on Instagram or Facebook.

Since I was a kid, I've had a hard time looking into the mirror and being happy with the person looking back at me. I can't blame my parents for my insecurities because they're two beautifully created humans, I cannot blame God because He doesn't make mistakes (right, I mean).

Over the course of the last few months or even maybe a year, I've attempted to show less of my face online but more of my personality when it comes to camera work and writing. All of this isn't done for the likes (hearts and thumbs), it's done because it helps heal my heart and ease my thoughts from time to time.

How many of you have liked someone and in those moments of twitter-pation made an attempt to tell said individual exactly what you're feelings were/are? "You know what, IF you're not busy next week, I'd like to go to dinner or grab some drinks or something..."

To be honest I've never had much luck with the dating aspect of things, I mean I've only had three legitimate girlfriends in my life. There were friendships which I wanted to have when I was younger, that have shaped how I view myself now. This isn't so much a woe is me piece as much as it is, WHOA IT'S ME, get out of your head you big dummy!

You don't like any of my pictures but you like someone who is lesser than me, you don't flirt with me but you exchange messages with someone who is into their persona... Insecurities creep up at the most impromptu times and make us feel a way.

Today, I looked in the mirror and saw someone familiar staring back at me and I told him, "Why be bothered with all that takes place around you, be focused on you and your improvement". Man, it's almost as if I were talking to myself (I didn't answer though so I'm still okay).

If you're not happy with you, do not rely on someone else to heal you, make you feel good, or love/like you in the fashion you want; instead attempt to focus on you and love yourself through the process, the season that you're in whenever such season appears. I also think, one of the worst things in life is to be lonely and to be lonely because you've made up your mind that your value doesn't add up to that of someone else you hold in high regard.

The advice that I would give a twelve year old me would be simple, actually it's the same advice I would give a twenty five year old me, a thirty four year old me, and a me of fifteen minutes ago, "Every duckling grows up and learns how to fly, there's beauty in that.. Learn to fly."


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