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  • Writer's pictureNemi

Checkmate In Two...

Look, I haven't played chess in years, the title just came to me as I was sitting here thinking about what next steps I need to make, with this whole life progression thing. I mean today has been somewhat of a blur, I woke up, took an awesome shower (weird), got dressed, and went into the office to knock out a bit of work; after that I've literally lost track of everything else, well I did sit in my car for almost two hours.

I digress...

Is anyone else searching for consistency, some type of solid ground? IF the terrain isn't consistent/solid, I'm probably not wearing my fawncy shoes, to walk around the park per se. I suppose the same can be said in my life at the moment, there's not much fawncy taking place.

Over the course of the last year, I've battled and made some really uncomfortable moves in order to gain more consistency and no uncomfortable does not relate to work or relationships. I'd love to tell you my goals but those are held as closely as my loves and finances; just know that there's a sense of growth which has taken place within my life.

As I look around me though, I'm beginning to find that so many people are okay with the mundane, the mediocre, and that in turn causes me to wonder what are we all chasing. If we're not after healthier lives, friendships, relationships, work environments, etc., what are we really doing with our time?

Each day I come home almost as though I'm stuck in a form of Groundhog Day. I suppose I've created this lifestyle of isolation which at times fits me and then other times leaves me feeling bat-shit crazy. Yes, I used the word shit (I'm still a decent human, it's a word, let's move on. Do not tell my dad about the usage of the word, tho. I kid, but for real don't tell him.)

My wants aren't extreme and I doubt many people's are, we allow so much other junk to simply get in our way, junk like not being true to ourselves; I'm writing to myself just as much as I'm writing for you. There are only so many hours within our days for us to "happy"; it's easy to wish for something to change. We have zero idea how long we're going be here, here being alive.

I'm seeing the board laid out before me and it's my move so I'm back to saying... "Checkmate in two".

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