Today feels a bit different, it's not gloomy though it's not sunny and warm as well, just sort of an in between type of day. I fell asleep thinking that I need to focus a bit more on things which I can control instead of staring at me phone until 1a hoping for a something to capture my eyes and heart.
It's strange isn't it, the things which keep our minds busy and the things which we pay no mind of as well. Yesterday, my workday concluded with a call to a homie who lives in Portland, Oregon. Our conversation was about being creative and the various aspects we're incorporating into a project which I'm currently building and hoping to launch by spring or early summer. During the course of our conversation, I found myself very relaxed, my thoughts were flowing and my creativity was bubbling as it has been for the last month or so. Maybe it's time?
There are few within my life who push me to be better today than I was yesterday, who push me to share my voice, thoughts, or imagination. The truth is we need people within our lives who care about our growth/our maturation. I care enough about where I stand and in turn where my steps are leading me to but let me tell you, it sure is a lot easier when you have others who help to keep me accountable.
We are three, almost four months, into this new year and my energy levels are still good, my want to increase in knowledge is still there too, however, my desire to step into the light is peaked due to the fact, I've been sitting on the sidelines for so long it feels. My ego is in check because this isn't for me as much as it is for others who feel stymied by life these days.
I want to tell you exactly what's in my head but the truth is I rather show you and show you I will, within my timeframe of course. The beauty which I seek is inside of voice, my smile, my thoughts, and actions, it has always been this way, I'm just adjusting my eyes and ears to understand the power I possess. I hope you all look in the mirror and smile at the person smiling back at you, too.
The person I've had the hardest time loving is the person you're seeing now... (And so it begins)
I misplaced my mixtapes
Replaced my mistakes
Place of comfort
Is my safe place
My mind wanders at a slow pace
Close my eyes and retrace
The lines which create your soft face
I'm searching for you...