In 1999, a young woman told me that I would never see the world or at least the UK, I'm pretty sure it's the same gal who told me a few years later that I couldn't afford her makeup, right as she was breaking up with me during an intermission break at church. IF only words didn't sting and my memory were a bit shorter, IF only I wasn't given an opportunity to realize my worth through much trial and error.
You see life is a journey, a winding road filled with peaks and valleys, it's up to us to choose where we'd like to adventure to. In all fairness, the woman was right, I couldn't afford her makeup and I would have worked my waking days attempting to help her stay cute. Well, as fate would have it, I saw her and her husband out at dinner not too long ago and age was creeping up and she was still not mixing her makeup correctly but who am I to care now; some things we have to smirk at and thank the lord for his mercies.
I would love to tell you all about how many different adventures I've embarked upon within the last fifteen years, the couches, the air mattresses, the hotel rooms, laughter, lack of sleep, food, spirits, and spontaneity which have accompanied each and every trip. It's slightly wild to sit here and think that I've stood in the Alpes and also at the base of the Pyramids, I've walked within the Louvre and touched the Rosetta Stone, the source of language as we know it, as well as kissed the Blarney Stone in Ireland.
The idea of being younger and experiencing these adventures is something that my buddy Bobby and me often speak of when reflecting upon our travels. When on our deathbeds, will we remember what we didn't do or will we remember the adventures we had during our brief time on this planet.
Some years back, a therapist said during one of our sessions that he could not imagine going on any trip and not taking his wife; his comment was to the observation that I traveled without my wife quite often (obviously I've never been married). This week I finally thought about his statement and how I missed my opportunity to ask him what his eyes and heart would feel or had seen, if said adventures had a cloud over them; I imagine he'd say, it's okay to adventure alone if your space, energy, is pure.
For the last ten months, almost, I've awakened without any clouds, any conflicts, any pressure; it's an interesting observation which I've sat in for a few days now. When friends speak of turmoil within their relationships, I simply think of where I am now and how long it took me to work up the courage to jump across the divide, to a place of contentment. I know it's not easy for the heart and mind many a times, as I sat within a valley for many years, however, when the time was right to make a move, move I did, from a place of heartache to a place of peace and this is in no way a knock of any sort, time is fleeting.
IF any of you have glanced at the picture below, you're probably wondering where the body is given the fact that there's only a shadow pictured, jumping across the divide. This is what our spirits look like when they've finally reached a point of being ready to jump to a place of safety.
Now mind you, I'm not perfect nor do I like to present something so complicated in such a simplistic fashion but the truth, my truth is simple... We only have so much time, IF we're not adding some form of peace to our lives, we're losing our ability to enjoy the beauty that is before us, on a daily basis. In all of my reflection(s), all of my nights of quiet, I find that I'm still growing/learning how to function; the ability to touch places so magnificent, people so awesome, creating memories so epic are a microcosm of said growth/learning.
I pray, I haven't ruined anyone along this journey, lessened anyone's energy or desires; in the end we only get one of these life things, so why not attempt to either live it with someone who will hold your hand and push you forward when you feel like giving up, someone whom you can point at and say, "That's my person", someone who will meet you on the other side of the divide and ask you what took you so long to arrive, or YOU... MAYBE YOU'LL FIND YOU.